April 18th Sunday noon
The sun rises late in my life. The rosy fingers of dawn have fully opened and the bright yellow light of day shows a crystal blue sky, hours before I rise.. I’ve survived another night.
We are a small population, us lone walkers. We face the world with our demons, alone, as the rest of the world skips passed us, hand in hand, two by two. Our heads may drop to watch our sinking hearts but we do not let people see that we are different.
Everyone has friends that others can not see; That inner voice we seek for council, our conscience that requires constant rationalizations, even departed loved ones that in our silence we ..know.. are by our sides, trying to be helpful guides. They all help us navigate this confusing life. We all pretend this isn’t true…We want the world to see us as steady, bright-eyed, independent spirits… ready to climb the ladder of obtainment, success and true love to reach the nourishing fruits we see, hanging just beyond reach…believing if we do what is right, Life will give us a boost from time to time.
We all hope our personal demons stay out of the way of our progress. Who is really in control? The cosmic river flow (?)…where some sink, others swim, some people easily ride the tide while others crash against the rocks and splatter into smaller drops…and still, we keep going. Still, we keep hoping for a road sign to mark our paths. Humans are a remarkable species…capable of outrageous fun and revelry , capable of unspeakable crimes against our own kind. A spirit can be so fragile as to be blown apart by an unaccepting glare of judgment or raised to the highest peak by a wink of approval.
Yet, for all of our similar differences, simple intolerance can break a spirit forever. Acceptance, can raise a soul from the pit of despair and give back life. WE are all powerful. We choose and follow Fate. We, decide how to live with our personal demons. We are omnipotent unto ourselves.
